Awkward Gym Moments

[Zillon]

nah, girls farts smell like roses and daisies on a sunny spring day.

My girlfriend must be defective, then.

 

[Gunkata]

On the topic of lady "tooting," I was walking to my desk down a hallway @ work. A woman whom works in the next team over is walking about 10-15ft front of me. She turns her head to peak over her shoulder and notices that someone is behind her (me), she then starts walking REALLY fast. I'm like, "wtf?" So I continue walking in her steps and it hits me like a sack of bricks. She let one or multiple go. It was deadly. I guess she was on her way to the bathroom (I hope). That was FUNKYY.

crop dusting.

 

[dubessa]

On the topic of lady "tooting," I was walking to my desk down a hallway @ work. A woman whom works in the next team over is walking about 10-15ft front of me. She turns her head to peak over her shoulder and notices that someone is behind her (me), she then starts walking REALLY fast. I'm like, "wtf?" So I continue walking in her steps and it hits me like a sack of bricks. She let one or multiple go. It was deadly. I guess she was on her way to the bathroom (I hope). That was FUNKYY.

AGHAHAHHAHAHGAHHHAHAHGHHAHA
:lol::lol::lol:

rotten egg saladicious.

 

[Xtreme1]

nah, girls farts smell like roses and daisies on a sunny spring day.

LMAO that's the excuse I give to my wife. My farts are like rose pettels. She responds with "it's a shame that they are rotting ones!"

 

[Shini]

I remember my girl farted once, and said excuse me, to let me know the bomb was dropped. Now 99% of the time when she does this, I smell nothing. And this time, it took some time before it hit me, but I flipped out and blamed the dog because I had completely forgot she said that. Just went "OH MY GOD ARES DUDE KEEP IT TO YOURSELF!! Baby this is rancid, it smells worse!! Jesus Christo! (Spanish)" then it hit me when I saw the look of shame on her face that it was her and not the dog. Whoops.

 

[jbcritch]

Been there. I had been out with the lads the night before and had a skin full topped off with a curry. The next day the wife takes me out shopping. Got bubble guts real bad. So we are standing in the check out line. My stomach turns over and the fart feeling came. Thought I would squeeze out a silent one. So let that baby go. Didn't realize there was a little girl stood right behind me bent down looking at a toy on the shelf. I ripped that baby right in her face. It was like naiparm. I had to walk away and leave the wife standing there.

She was none to happy when she met me outside. She even told me that the little girl was almost sick and then was staring at my wife thinking that she let it go.

Not a gym story but thought I would share as the topic slid onto farts.

This literally made mey cry laughing! Nice!

 

[TommyM]

This thread is hilarious, im crying in class!!!!!


Sent from my mk6 using Tapatalk

 

[rawbdog]

just heard the gf fart for the first time over the weekend. i felt embarrassed for her because it just had no character. i told her next time to really let one rip so she could redeem herself.

 

[Cwykle99]

Ahhh gym farts. I remember when I was young(er) and dumb(er) I was working my abs. Pretty heavy that day too, I had a buddy doing medicine ball tosses to me to finish up, and I have the headphones blasting (PUSH IT!!!!) and really getting intense. Every rep I see my buddy smiling like an idiot, but we always mess with each other so I just ignore him. Finally I go to throw the ball back and he's walking away hunched over. Turns out every time I would contract my abs I was letting out short, small, but very audible farts. Here I thought people we're staring because I'm just so INTENSE!!! Nope, I was putting on a fire cracker demo apparently...

 

[thedude4bides]

Not a gym story, but sort of...

At BCCC my buddy asks me to twist one up. So, of course, I oblige. I'm thinking "My car is a mile away, where the hell can I roll a phatty?... Aha! The men's bathroom in the gym locker room!". No one, I mean no one has been there in like two decades, so I thought it was safe.

Anyway, I get there and walk past all the old rusted musky lockers, past the moldy spiderweb-laden showers, and into the bathroom. The first stall was locked with no one in it... Odd. So I go to the next stall, close the door, and sit down with a book on my lap and start breaking up the bud.

I just happen to notice that someone cut a hole the size of a fist in the stall and wrote "for BJ, stick cock here" with an arrow pointing to the hole. I chuckled an thought "someone is pretty damn funny ha ha".

I keep carefully and painstakingly breaking up the bud.

Then I heard footsteps. I'm paranoid. The last thing I need is to be busted rolling a doob in between classes. So I freeze. I mean, I don't even breathe when this guy sits in the stall next to me.

A few minutes go by. I notice his white nike shoes. I'm kinda freaking out. I start thinking "how long is this dude gonna shit for, what the hell!".

He stands up and I'm thinking "great, I can finish this freaking J... Whew!". The next thing I know a throbbing hard cock is sticking through the fucking hole!!!

HOLY SHIT WTF!!!!

I flipped. I almost lost all the bud trying to chase this sick mofo.


I later learned that was just a glory hole...

 

[dubessa]

HAAHHA EWWWWW

but I haz a sad for the lost weed

 

[rawbdog]

hahaah that shit is hilarious! wtf was he doing the hole time rubbin one out so he can get a stiffy? some weird shit goin on over there...

 

[Mr.Raia]

LOL!!! :lol: #storyoftheday. HAHA!

 

[Stadpad]

mostly its just trying not to get caught staring at the chicks in yoga pants

 

[Xtreme1]

That's some funny shit. I would have used the book and slapped that bishop frecking hard.

He would never stick his toddger through a hole again. Plus I don't think he would be able to run a way for a while.

Sick puppy !