Awkward Gym Moments

[lilfleck]

That's some funny shit. I would have used the book and slapped that bishop frecking hard.

He would never stick his toddger through a hole again. Plus I don't think he would be able to run a way for a while.

Sick puppy !

lmao!!!

 

[thedude4bides]

That's some funny shit. I would have used the book and slapped that bishop frecking hard.

He would never stick his toddger through a hole again. Plus I don't think he would be able to run a way for a while.

Sick puppy !

If I caught him it wouldn't have been pretty... In a sense, I'm glad I didn't catch up to him because my whole life could be different. I mean, the way the world is today, I would have been locked up for a hate crime...

I can see the cross examination now:
Me:"but he stuck his dick in my face..."
Prosecutor: "... And that gave you the right to squeeze lemon juice in the paper cuts you gave him on his nipples after you urinated in his ears and hung him by his finger nails?"

 

[MaliciousMK6]

Not a gym story, but sort of...

At BCCC my buddy asks me to twist one up. So, of course, I oblige. I'm thinking "My car is a mile away, where the hell can I roll a phatty?... Aha! The men's bathroom in the gym locker room!". No one, I mean no one has been there in like two decades, so I thought it was safe.

Anyway, I get there and walk past all the old rusted musky lockers, past the moldy spiderweb-laden showers, and into the bathroom. The first stall was locked with no one in it... Odd. So I go to the next stall, close the door, and sit down with a book on my lap and start breaking up the bud.

I just happen to notice that someone cut a hole the size of a fist in the stall and wrote "for BJ, stick cock here" with an arrow pointing to the hole. I chuckled an thought "someone is pretty damn funny ha ha".

I keep carefully and painstakingly breaking up the bud.

Then I heard footsteps. I'm paranoid. The last thing I need is to be busted rolling a doob in between classes. So I freeze. I mean, I don't even breathe when this guy sits in the stall next to me.

A few minutes go by. I notice his white nike shoes. I'm kinda freaking out. I start thinking "how long is this dude gonna shit for, what the hell!".

He stands up and I'm thinking "great, I can finish this freaking J... Whew!". The next thing I know a throbbing hard cock is sticking through the fucking hole!!!

HOLY SHIT WTF!!!!

I flipped. I almost lost all the bud trying to chase this sick mofo.


I later learned that was just a glory hole...

ROFL! no way, i call BS:bs: no way this story every happened! I did lol though.

 

[Stadpad]

gross^^^:lol:

 

[Xtreme1]

Prosecutor: "... And that gave you the right to squeeze lemon juice in the paper cuts you gave him on his nipples after you urinated in his ears and hung him by his finger nails?"

Sherlock Holmes would call that a Lemon entry !

I get where your coming from on this. Think I would have been doing some jail time if it was me.

 

[JDM713]

yeah if you see a glory hole that means its a known gay hangout bathroom and you should not shit there, or if you do shit and get out quick. the fact that you were in there so long is like a signal to these people. also that you saw his white nikes means he was probably intentionally moving his shoes over the boundary into your stall as another signal. in his defense it did seem like you were into it. not speaking from personal experience by the way, I read a long thread on reddit one time out of curiosity on these things.

 

[thedude4bides]

ROFL! no way, i call BS:bs: no way this story every happened! I did lol though.

Right, because in between meetings at work while skimming a thread on awkwardness at the gym and female farting I quickly came up with a highly descriptive story that resembles nothing I've heard anywhere else.

If I were that creative I'd be sipping lattes in Starbucks writing best selling novels on my MacBook Air.

Glad you got a laugh out of though

 

[DBESTGTI1]

^^^ it's damn near straight from the movie Sex Drive with some details changed.

 

[McQueen77]

i used to go to bally which became l.a. fitness or as i came to call it, el gay fitness. the one i went to in pasadena has the whole shower/sauna/hot tub/faux spa vibe set up in there so now and then, i'd sit in the dry sauna or the steam one. every time, without fail, there's always some dude in there lurking and trolling.. you're sitting there on the bench, rolling solo, towel on (curse the guys who sit in there naked, jesus what is wrong with you?) and some small filipino man comes in there naked and sits next to you on the bench. i'm staring straight ahead, planning my exit and i can just feel this guy's eyes on me. sometimes i'd be like "why are you staring at me?" just totally put them on the spot and then they look away, awkwardly thinking "guess he doesnt want to hook up".. sometimes the guy tries to make broken english small talk.. like, dude are you kidding me? why are you talking to me right now?

other times you get the guys that sit in there for way too long, just pouring sweat and doing all this weird shit like methodically and aggressively wiping the sweat off their limbs, slapping themselves.. its disgusting. why can't they just sit there? people are disgusting, period. little gay filipino men that lurk in the sauna portion of el gay fitness are terrible. gym story? no. gym observations.. the hollywood bally total fitness was worse. just full-on aggressive gay pick up scene. suggestively grasping the handles of the bench press machine and staring.. you want to be like "dude, does that shit actually work?!" like I'm going to be like "hello there... i couldn't help but notice the way you were playfully gripping the treadmill bars.. wanna hang out?"

now we go to the verdugo Hills YMCA in la canada, which is a really nice facility.. family place.. totally bland, no creeps. mid 40s housewives or divorcees with fake boobs, just working for it on the machines..

 

[rawbdog]

i used to go to bally which became l.a. fitness or as i came to call it, el gay fitness. the one i went to in pasadena has the whole shower/sauna/hot tub/faux spa vibe set up in there so now and then, i'd sit in the dry sauna or the steam one. every time, without fail, there's always some dude in there lurking and trolling.. you're sitting there on the bench, rolling solo, towel on (curse the guys who sit in there naked, jesus what is wrong with you?) and some small filipino man comes in there naked and sits next to you on the bench. i'm staring straight ahead, planning my exit and i can just feel this guy's eyes on me. sometimes i'd be like "why are you staring at me?" just totally put them on the spot and then they look away, awkwardly thinking "guess he doesnt want to hook up".. sometimes the guy tries to make broken english small talk.. like, dude are you kidding me? why are you talking to me right now?

other times you get the guys that sit in there for way too long, just pouring sweat and doing all this weird shit like methodically and aggressively wiping the sweat off their limbs, slapping themselves.. its disgusting. why can't they just sit there? people are disgusting, period. little gay filipino men that lurk in the sauna portion of el gay fitness are terrible. gym story? no. gym observations.. the hollywood bally total fitness was worse. just full-on aggressive gay pick up scene. suggestively grasping the handles of the bench press machine and staring.. you want to be like "dude, does that shit actually work?!" like I'm going to be like "hello there... i couldn't help but notice the way you were playfully gripping the treadmill bars.. wanna hang out?"

now we go to the verdugo Hills YMCA in la canada, which is a really nice facility.. family place.. totally bland, no creeps. mid 40s housewives or divorcees with fake boobs, just working for it on the machines..

hahahaha that is why i NEVER enter the sauna at el gay fitness. plus the one by my place is so packed you can never find a set of dumbells, only just one. i wish i had my own set up in my garage.

 

[thedude4bides]

^^^ it's damn near straight from the movie Sex Drive with some details changed.

I'll take your word for it :thumbsup:

... Unless its worth watching :iono:

 

[DBESTGTI1]

It's definitely worth watching. Watch the rated version before the unrated version though. It's one of my favorite comedies.

 

[J-Cooz]

I hate all the old man dong in the change rooms. When walking to and from the shower wear your god damn towel. I don't need to see your dick. Also when you're shaving or doing your hair wear a towel, this isn't your house.

 

[Tk_mkv1]

this one guy at my gym tried to take a picture of this girl running in the treadmill, in there it was me, him, the girl and her boyfriend (at night when staff isn't there). when i was just done with my workout and about to leave her boyfriend saw the guy taking pictures of his gf as i was walking out. haven't seen the kid since or the couple

 

[Gunkata]

I hate all the old man dong in the change rooms. When walking to and from the shower wear your god damn towel. I don't need to see your dick. Also when you're shaving or doing your hair wear a towel, this isn't your house.