Awkward Gym Moments

[Gunkata]

There's a guy in our gym at work named DeShawn.

He has... a monster dong.

Like.. massive.

As in like, 8inches long... flacid.


When he takes showers, he acts the same as Mr. Bieber here. Just gayfully airing out his blackmonster cock and black kiwi's. It's like a large sausage, or perhaps a baby's forearm with an apple for a head. It is GIGANTIC.

He walks around for what seems like an eternity. Just taunting us regular peened guys in the gym. First towel drying, then the hair dryer , then just kinda hanging out - I almost want to ask him, do you need a pair of underpants or?

I eventually had to tell my gay black co-worker about this and I immediately deemed this guy the nickname of "DeDong".... the co-worker then seemed VERY interested in getting a gym membership.

 

[Shini]

.......Kept singing. LIKE A BOSS

fixed

 

[Shini]

There's a guy in our gym at work named DeShawn.

He has... a monster dong.

Like.. massive.

As in like, 8inches long... flacid.


When he takes showers, he acts the same as Mr. Bieber here. Just gayfully airing out his blackmonster cock and black kiwi's. It's like a large sausage, or perhaps a baby's forearm with an apple for a head. It is GIGANTIC.

He walks around for what seems like an eternity. Just taunting us regular peened guys in the gym. First towel drying, then the hair dryer , then just kinda hanging out - I almost want to ask him, do you need a pair of underpants or?

I eventually had to tell my gay black co-worker about this and I immediately deemed this guy the nickname of "DeDong".... the co-worker then seemed VERY interested in getting a gym membership.

...You gotta show it off if you have it!


Only awkward gym moment is when I was running on the treadmill, and the place was like, empty. No one was on the treadmills. A very cute girl walks up, gets on the treadmill next to me. I've got my headphones on just jamming. And I think to myself

Why did she pick this one so close to me?

Is she interested in me? Should I take my headphones out and start up a conversation? Or does she just like this particular brand of Treadmill? (There's only 2 of the ones I'm on) What do I do? WHAT DO I DO? Do I say something or do I ignore her? But no one just ignores people in Texas so thats just rude anyway. But what if she thinks I'm just saying hi so I can hit on her and thinks I'm a jerk or something, I don't want that. WHAT DO I DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Stopped the machine, walked away.

 

[mk6medic]

There's a guy in our gym at work named DeShawn.

He has... a monster dong.

Like.. massive.

As in like, 8inches long... flacid.


When he takes showers, he acts the same as Mr. Bieber here. Just gayfully airing out his blackmonster cock and black kiwi's. It's like a large sausage, or perhaps a baby's forearm with an apple for a head. It is GIGANTIC.

He walks around for what seems like an eternity. Just taunting us regular peened guys in the gym. First towel drying, then the hair dryer , then just kinda hanging out - I almost want to ask him, do you need a pair of underpants or?

I eventually had to tell my gay black co-worker about this and I immediately deemed this guy the nickname of "DeDong".... the co-worker then seemed VERY interested in getting a gym membership.

That is comical. I can relate. In high school I played football and our FB, Reggie, was the same way. Flaunted that shit all the time. There was another guy, Seth, who made it a point that all underclassmen had to spend 2 minutes staring at it. Ah, hazing! So much fun! That and atomic situps.

DeDong ftw!

 

[lilfleck]

...You gotta show it off if you have it!


Only awkward gym moment is when I was running on the treadmill, and the place was like, empty. No one was on the treadmills. A very cute girl walks up, gets on the treadmill next to me. I've got my headphones on just jamming. And I think to myself

Why did she pick this one so close to me?

Is she interested in me? Should I take my headphones out and start up a conversation? Or does she just like this particular brand of Treadmill? (There's only 2 of the ones I'm on) What do I do? WHAT DO I DO? Do I say something or do I ignore her? But no one just ignores people in Texas so thats just rude anyway. But what if she thinks I'm just saying hi so I can hit on her and thinks I'm a jerk or something, I don't want that. WHAT DO I DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Stopped the machine, walked away.

Lol. Do you have ceiling fans above the treadmills? There are two ceiling fans on top of the treadmills @ my gym. I don't like a cold sweat, so I always pick an end or middle machine. It always happens to be next to someone with plenty of other empty machines. They always look confused... oh well.

 

[Gunkata]

i've had the girl comes by you at the treadmill thing too - so weird when they don't seem responsive, so you're like, "is this bitch just fucking with me!?"


If I can get blackholed on here, can I create a new SN as "DEDONG"?

 

[Skipdr]

This is gonna be an awesome thread.

 

[lilfleck]

i've had the girl comes by you at the treadmill thing too - so weird when they don't seem responsive, so you're like, "is this bitch just fucking with me!?"


If I can get blackholed on here, can I create a new SN as "DEDONG"?

Maybe Dubessa can chime in here. Or one of the other ladies.

 

[SayaGTI]

Was hitting some lat pulls on a machine and the bench attached to it is much longer than needed so I was only using a small portion. All of a sudden, this dude sits behind me.....facing my back as I'm doing these exercises....doesn't say a single fucking word...

It's almost midnight on a Friday, he's definitely sober and you can't just Waltz into the gym without checking in with your membership card and seeing security on the way in.

I...I still don't know what he wanted.

 

[miguelr]

Had the idea for this thread for so very long, but never did it. Too many stories keep getting passed, so finally.......I created the thread for everyone to share their awesome, hilarious, ridiculous gym stories

I'll start.

So today, I'm taking my normal shower and doing my business. Normally, its so early (4am) that people dont walk in or bother me.

So I'm drying my ballsack and taint, when out of nowhere....I bust into a song. Imagine the "Spider Pig Riff" from the Simpsons.

Drying my Taint
Drying my Taint
If I dont dry it, they'll cuss like a saint.

I have no idea why I was singing it. Probably because I was all jacked up from the workout. Well, the ONLY time I've ever done this a gentleman walks in mid verse. The man not only heard me sing, but I froze the moment he came in.

At this moment I could only imagine what he was thinking because I had my junk just airing out and towel drying and singing this God awful song..

He turned around and left. So what did I do?


.......Kept singing.

 

[Gunkata]

A guy farted next to me while putting on his ice skates yesterday. Not at a gym, but "physical" nonetheless. He pretended like nothing happened, but I knew it sounded like someone stepped on a frog...

 

[grambles423]

A guy farted next to me while putting on his ice skates yesterday. Not at a gym, but "physical" nonetheless. He pretended like nothing happened, but I knew it sounded like someone stepped on a frog...

LMAO. I cannot keep a straight face in public if this ever happens. I'm 2 years old inside.

 

[rblgti]

A guy farted next to me while putting on his ice skates yesterday. Not at a gym, but "physical" nonetheless. He pretended like nothing happened, but I knew it sounded like someone stepped on a frog...

This totally just made me laugh out loud hahahahaha

I would immediately start laughing if I were in this situation. Can't help it.

 

[rawbdog]

well this isn't an awkward moment, just kind of embarrassing. when i went to max out on squats with my buddy, i got the weight off the racks and when i went to squat, i knew i couldn't do it so i dropped the weight and not only did that bounce everywhere, but all the weights on the racks fell off and i hit the lady next to me (luckily) with a 10 pounder right in the thigh since it was rubber and bounced super high.it was so loud that everyone was staring at me like wtf (there is a shit ton of members at my gym so it was at least like a solid 60+ people staring lol).
also busted a fat fart in front of a chick while i was benching and she looked at me with the most disgusted face and i just started cracking up.

 

[Xtreme1]

A guy farted next to me while putting on his ice skates yesterday. Not at a gym, but "physical" nonetheless. He pretended like nothing happened, but I knew it sounded like someone stepped on a frog...

Been there. I had been out with the lads the night before and had a skin full topped off with a curry. The next day the wife takes me out shopping. Got bubble guts real bad. So we are standing in the check out line. My stomach turns over and the fart feeling came. Thought I would squeeze out a silent one. So let that baby go. Didn't realize there was a little girl stood right behind me bent down looking at a toy on the shelf. I ripped that baby right in her face. It was like naiparm. I had to walk away and leave the wife standing there.

She was none to happy when she met me outside. She even told me that the little girl was almost sick and then was staring at my wife thinking that she let it go.

Not a gym story but thought I would share as the topic slid onto farts.